The promised list

Intentions. Resolutions are just that, no? Intentions to achieve a goal. At Chef Geoff's, we had a great VP who constantly drilled into our heads the concept of Measurable Goals. At each quarterly strategy meeting, our teams would present their initiatives for the next three months, and Chris would always ask - How are you measuring the success of this goal? For me, this was a new way of thinking about accomplishment. It's a presumably intuitive aspect of action management, but it can be much more difficult to integrate than you might think.

While I've done a pretty good job of defining various goals for myself in the next year (and beyond)(, I haven't gotten to the stage of analyzing their measurability and achievability. While I don't think that every goal needs to be measurable, I do think it helps to keep me focused. Some things are naturally intangible, though, although the achievement of those prospects are just as important.

The List.

1. To take better care of myself.

This is most definitively not a resolution to lose weight, dress better or change my physical appearance in any way. It's an effort to do exactly what I said - to take better care of myself mentally, physically, spiritually, and intellectually.

Motherhood means sacrifice, but it doesn't have to mean servitude to your child via neglect of your own self. I forgot a little bit of that this past year. I by no means forgot to embrace my own personhood, but I have started to let go of some of the things that I believe define who I am. I also don't think this change was completely instigated by the birth of Cass - so many things change, all the time. Work, relationships, budgets, family, and so many other imminent obligations can begin to chip away at who you are over time. I have come to realize that we all need to take a few moments each day dedicated to ourselves. Being the best me enables me to be the best mom, wife, friend and professional that I'm capable of being, and this year I intend to re-embrance the passions that make me who I am.

2. To be a better professional.

I have always prided myself on being a great employee. No matter what it was, I always wanted to be the best. The best = successful, right? Wrong. In event planning, that attitude doesn't get you very far. To achieve, you need to be really aggressive; while your toolbox of skills does apply, a huge part of success boils down to determination and the ability to demand what you want. While I'd consider myself a great saleswoman for my company, I've never really had the "go get 'em" attitude that is prevalent in so many successful event planners. It's totally a personality trait. This is why I hate event planners. But, I've also never been fully committed. It took me some time to let go of other interests before I could actually say out load - My Name is Danielle, and I'm Going to Be a Kick Ass Event Planner.

I'm fortunate to have a great boss who lets me take risks and tackle challenges, and who really lets me design my own "curriculum", you might say, for my job. I thought about this job long and hard before accepting it. It could have been 2 steps back, or it could have been 5 steps forward. Right now, I think I'm about breaking even, but the prospects for 2011 are amazing.

I'm making some great steps within the walls of the Mead Center, but I know that I need to push myself and break outside of my comfort bubble. I need to learn to network well, and be a better salesperson for myself. I'll be taking the plunge and finally joining ISES this year. I want to start an event planning blog. I wan to look more into event education; I'd love to be able to teach part-time someday, and the DC area is a great place for both education and teaching.

Along these same lines, I want to make growing Cameron's photography business a bigger priority. Have y'all seen some of his new work lately? His portraits? They are a.m.a.z.i.n.g. I know that the two of us together can be a powerhouse, if only we can harness our energy into maximum productivity. That's really darn difficult with an extremely active one-year old, but he's not getting any younger, and it's not going to get any easier, so we just need to light a fire under our butts and get it done. I know we can, though. CWP's income from iStock doubled in 2010 - how's that for a measurable goal?

Really, this year is about learning to achieve my potential. Nothing teaches you more about yourself, and your relationship with your partner, than pregnancy, childbirth and parenthood. NOTHING. It's so cliche to say that, I know, but it's cliche for a reason - it's nitty-gritty true. Having Cass has made us both want to be better, and to achieve more. We want to be the best role models we can be for our child. We want to give him as much as we can, and not (just) material things - experiences, knowledge, humor, travel - those will shape him more as a young man than toys or clothes or other physical items. And as I said before - when I'm at my best, I'm able to give at my best (or better).

Re-focus. That's my word for 2011. What's yours?

Farewell 2010

If there is one thing I've always hated about the concept of the New Year, it's resolutions. They are trite and repetitive, and I've always felt as though I'm setting myself up for failure by creating unrealistic expectations of what I can achieve in 365 days.

But then, the universe slapped me in the face.

It went ahead and handed me 2010 - a year that brought me so very many blessings and challenges and lessons that it's hard to follow-up a year such as that and claim that getting everything you want without learning a million things about yourself isn't possible. 2010 was special.

Cassian gave us a full year of smiles, babbles, snuggles, hugs and kisses. He is the definition of joy. Parenthood is hard, no doubt. But it's about a bajillion times more rad than it is hard.

We got hitched :) Four years, one dog, two cats, a baby and about 3,483,247 belly laughs later, Cameron and I made it official. We enjoyed a lovely ceremony officiated by our best friends, and attended by our closest loved one. It was perfect for us. I had imagined my wedding for so. many. years. But here's the thing about weddings - they're aren't just about the bride, no matter how many times she's dreamed of her big day. So, while I might have imagined my wedding, I had little imagined our wedding. Suffice it to say, the latter exceeded my expectations immensely. It was a perfect day. Like parenthood, marriage presents its difficulties. But, as Cameron likes to remind me - "you married this guy". Yes, yes I did - a promise is a promise is a promise, and I wouldn't change a single thing.

Other notable events:

- I landed a great new job as the Special Events Manager at a local theater. I love being back in a theater. I love working 40 hours and being home more with my family. I love my new job.

- Cameron more than doubled his photography income over 2009. He also worked tremendously hard to define his style, and he and I have gotten much closer to defining the CWP brand.

- My wonderful mother-in-law, Pamela, moved in with us for 11 months. It gave she and I the chance to get to know, respect and appreciate one another in a way that many women do not get to know their mother-in-laws in the first few early years of marriage. It also gave Cass the chance to super-bond with his Gammy. Pam moved back to Utah in December, and while we are so happy for, and proud of, her, she is missed daily.

- I saw my own family more in 2010 than I have in yeeeears. I am certain this is due to the presence of Cassian, on both our parts, but still...it is lovely. I miss them every day, and love getting to see my parents, brothers, grandma, et. al. with more frequency.

- My best friend Pilar and my dear friend Lauren both got engaged to wonderful men. They will both make beautiful brides this fall. We have a photo to reshoot sooner than later :)

2010 presented it's trials as well. My family mourned the loss of my extraordinary maternal Grandfather. Grandpa Swick was special; he had a long, beautiful, full life that he shared with all he loved, and that is what I choose to remember. I like to occasionally drink an Irish Coffee in memoriam :) We also said good-bye to Erin's father Jim who, to be honest, passed too soon. Jim was a wonderful man, and I was blessed to know him for so many years. This year the Buchanans taught me a lot about faith, and resilience, and love.

Farewell 2010. I laughed, I cried, I loved, I lived. It was a great year.

And so, despite a renewed faith in the improbable, I still detest resolutions. I do, however, like goals. And lists. Oh, I very much like lists. So for 2011, I'm presenting a list of moderate, reasonable goals I would like to accomplish. The first item on that list is to maintain this blog with a lot more frequency. And so (hopefully) this week you shall read my 2011 to-do list.

'Till then...

Photo randomness

Playing with (i.e. chewing on) new toys and Grandma and Grandpa Esposti's house.

Sweet potato face; this kid LOVES his sweet potatoes.

Learning how to play video games with Uncle Ryan.

More playing!

Giggling goo, part deux

A quick post tonight! It's been a crazy week, but I didn't want time to fly by without another post.

Cass absolutely cracks up when Cameron and Rocco play ball or rope tug. It's a combination between Rocco running around all over the place, and one of us saying the phrase "Rocco, get that ball!" WHY this phrase makes him crack a smile, I have no idea...but, we obviously say it a LOT to elicit as many belly laughs as possible.



More tomorrow...

Thoughts on being a working Mother: Part 1, Bedtime

I think I'm going to write a little mini-series on being a working Mom. There are so many things about this first year of motherhood that I don't want to forget - even the struggles. These posts are dedicated to my Mother, who despite working full-time, somehow managed to do it all. My three brothers and I are loved, well-adjusted, happy adults who have awesome childhood memories. Thanks to you Mom, for not only constantly told me that I could have whatever I wanted, but lead by example too. Love you!

Tonight I rocked Cassian to sleep. I haven't done that in quite some time. I have been subscribing to the "sleepy but not asleep" method since he was about 2 months old, and it rarely fails. Cass is a good sleeper, and has been sleeping through the night since about 7 weeks (I know, I know...we know how lucky we are!).

Bedtime is Mom's job in the Whitman house. The first few weeks of Cass's life, I fought having bedtime as my sole responsibility. But now that I'm back to work, I savor it. Life is crazy in those hours between getting home from work and putting the baby down. There is dinner to be cooked, the day's activities to be caught up on, a baby to feed and play with, a dog to give attention to, and any number of other "to-do's" that quickly scrape away any bits of serenity that might otherwise be enjoyed.

Bedtime, however, is different. Bedtime is "our" time. Most nights Cass gets a bath, and from there we launch into "jam-time" and settle into the glider for snuggles and stories. "Goodnight Moon" and the "Going to Bed Book" are repeat offenders. We have several other dozen that rotate through the stacks. Lately "Harold and the Purple Crayon" has been a favorite. I think Cass likes the bright, simple illustrations.

Back to tonight. This week at work has been a little crazy. With the 10th Anniversary of Chef Geoff's last Wednesday, and a huge buy-out extravaganza at the Tysons location tomorrow, private party land has been BUSY. Thus, I am missing two bedtimes this week, which makes me a little cranky.

There are so many lessons about motherhood that I have learned, am in the process of learning, and have yet to be learned, but the biggest one I've learned the last month is to never take a moment for granted. Seems simple, yes? Of course. But, when so much of your life is splintered between work, chores, errands and getting through the day, recognizing that you need to slow down and breathe is a struggle.

Which is precisely why I rocked my little goo to sleep tonight. I realized for the first time that I don't really care if rocking him to sleep could potentially set me back a few weeks in "sleep training" or that the last dozen or so emails I have to answer won't get written until midnight. I had a moment with my kid, and it was wonderful. Watching his little face relax into dreamland, and seeing his fists unfurl as he goes deeper into sleep are the little things that I always want to remember.

Tonight I got the best of both worlds. It's a constant game of give-and-take. When I'm being a really great Mom, my job suffers a little. When I'm being a really great professional, my family suffers a little. It's all balanced out so far, and hopefully it will. Tonight was a little reminder for me to take the time to notice. I think I'll go ahead and put that on my daily "to-do" list ;)

Mangoes, Milestones and Bedroom Snippets

Cameron and I finally finished most of Cassian's "room". We spend the weekend purging, re-organizing and de-cluttering. The end result? A clean, organized, and fun (yet decidedly "boyish") room for Cass. Here are a few snippets.

Mr. Piggy Bank just loves gazing at the Kandinsky behind him.
A fluffy bear from Grandma and stripped bear (knitted by Mama) are buddies on the bookshelf.A cozy glider to read and listen to stories.
Every kid needs plenty of Pooh gear, including a super cool vintage pop-up, gifted by Courtney.

Handmade blankies from people who love us. I absolutely love that we have so many creative friends and family members that have created beautiful treasures for Cassian. He's one lucky little goo!


In other news, Cass had his first taste of frozen mango this weekend and he LOVED it! He was a little apprehensive at first, but after a few minutes he thoroughly enjoyed his first taste of sweet.




Meanwhile the adults enjoyed open-faced chicken sandwiches and curry vegetable salad.
Speaking of firsts, we've had a TON of them lately! While Cass is still a bit of a peanut size-wise, he's developing so quickly and learning something new every day. Being a parent has gotten so much more FUN in the last month! Between his facial reactions and budding personality, we are becoming more and more enamored each day. Some of his new tricks include:
- rolling from back to tummy, and tummy to back
- now that he's mastered rolling, he flip flops all over the space, and he is FAST; one minute he's on the playmat, and the the next moment he's halfway across the room!
- recognizing voices; he can very easily pick out mom and dad's voice from a phone call or across the room
- loving the sound of his own voice; his new interest is screeching, both for attention, and because he realizes that the sound he's making is HIS voice; and then as soon as you turn to him, he gives you a big, huge toothy grin. awwww...
- teeth! he's got two now (on the bottom) and we *think* he's teething again, but only time will tell on that one
- the very beginning stages of crawling; he likes to "swim" when on his belly, and is starting to scrunch his legs up under him and scoot around a bit - it's time to finish baby-proofing!

A day in the life

Photo randomness for your viewing pleasure...

Bruschetta and mint-ginger spiked lemonade. Yum. It was over 90 degrees all weekend - we all needed a late afternoon pick-me-up.


Rocco lounging on the patio.

Mint overtaking the garden. Unfortunately it's spearmint, but I've been filling mason jars with it and the house smells lovely.

Pepper plants and catnip thriving on to the patio.

Fabric swatches waiting to made into table runners for the wedding...

and matching vases, which are displayed on the mantle for the time-being. Just two months away from the big day!